What happened when I was too shy to ask the neighbours to move their car off our shared drive

I decided to drive through a different paddock, got the car completely stuck in mud, wheelspun a lot, got tangled in an electric fence and got electrocuted, all whilst the kids were crying and screaming. I managed to turn the power off the fence, climb under the car (in the cow shit and mud) detangle the wire from my wheel axels and get the car turned around before getting stuck again. 

By this point the cows have escaped out of the paddock. I’m doing all I can to get out of the mud whilst swearing at myself for undertaking this adventure. The neighbour I was too shy to talk to, gives me a push out of the paddock whilst my 5 year old runs to open the farm gate. The neighbour doesn’t speak a word…eek.

I get the kids out of the car so they can help me get the cows. Did I mention I’m barefoot running through knee deep mud? I shoo the cows back in the paddock, but I’ve yet to fix the fence and turn the power back on. The kids are distracted by mud, so the cows run past them out of the paddock. Aaaarrrrggghh! 

I manage to tie the fence back together (l snapped it with the car) and get the cows back in the paddock. A friendly neighbour turns up and helps put the fence posts back in so I can switch the electric fence back on.

Not sure I’ve ever had that much adrenaline pumping or been that embarrassed!!!! I don’t even know who’s paddock I was in, but I owe them wine!

I take the kids back to the beach. They’re just laughing at me (with kindness). 

My surfer friend must have sensed my distress, as she turns up with a beer and we spend the afternoon in the winter sunshine roasting apples in the fire and enjoying the kids (until 66% of them squirt in their pants and my hoodie ends up as toilet roll!)

You couldn’t make this stuff up!


5 thoughts on “What happened when I was too shy to ask the neighbours to move their car off our shared drive

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      1. Once, when I was first shoeing horses for other people (out of necessity — I then had a car payment and had lost the job I bought the car to commute to . . . but I knew how to shoe a horse . . . ) so I started with cold calling on horses I saw, and ended up with the really bad or neglected horses that didn’t have a farrier. I worked for a lady with a PIG FARM (as in, it STUNK really bad!!!) in the HOT summer heat, outside of Bakersfield!!! I had all my tools in a plastic bucket. Went to my car to get something. Came back, reached into the bucket to get out a tool, and the horse had urinated into the bucket!!! My tools were enveloped in four inches of piss . . . had to find a hose, wash it all off, muttering to myself, “Someday, this will make a great story!!!” It was the only positive thing I could come away with . . . Since then, I’ve worked for years shoeing horses in lovely places like Malibu and Hawaii. But I got my start on a pig farm in Bakersfield! :)) :))

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